Becoming a mother is one of the best things in the world, if not the absolute best. We go throughout our pregnancies dreaming of walks with our sleeping baby, cozy nights on the couch, meeting our girlfriends out for coffee and showing everyone how perfect this precious life is. The truth is not always so glamorous. The first few weeks (or even months) become a blur. You are lucky if you get a shower lasting longer than two minutes and you frequently question if you brushed your teeth that day. If you have friends who are new mommy’s themselves, consider yourself very blessed. If you aren’t, you quickly realize how nobody really understands what your daily life is like. It’s one thing to hear what your days are like; it is a completely different thing to actually live it.
Community. If you are the first of your friends to have a baby or maybe you live far away from your family and friends, you quickly begin to feel very isolated. This is why it is SO important to build a community of support. Motherhood is amazing, but it is also hard. There are days when you are counting the minutes till bedtime. There is no better way to create new friendships then to find others who are in the same boat as you. Whether it is frequenting the local libraries story time, sitting at the same coffee shop, walking the same path every day, if you see another mom, reach out to her. Get on your local message boards. Go out of your comfort zone. More than likely she is feeling the same way as you and is dying for some adult interaction, someone who gets what it is like.
Mommy Friends: They are your friends who understand if you are running 10(or 30) minutes late, you arrive wearing two different socks and then your child throws a full blown tantrum on the floor. You can call them to talk about your child’s most recent milestone, get tips on how to get the crayon out of the carpet or to complain on a particularly hard day. They get it. They are living the same life. While your friendship may start based on the fact that you have kids that are similar in age, it may very well turn in to something more. If you stay in the same community for a long time, you will watch each other’s kids grow up. You will share in the birthdays, the graduations, the summer vacations and more. You will be able to count on them in times of need and share in the times of joy. Maybe you already have the friend I am describing, and that’s great, but the mom sitting next to you at the park might not. Strike up a conversation, ask her about her kids and see where the conversation goes. We should all be so fortunate to have a “mommy friend.”