Being a “new” mama has got to be the world’s toughest job, and creating community in the new postpartum year seems to be the only way out.
When I say “new” I mean, every stinkin’ time you become a mother, no matter how many children you have, it’s a path, every time, with its own twists, turns, and triumphs. Yes, there are similarities. I’m the mother of three and there came to be a knowing after the first and second children that I was able to bring in to my mothering of my second and third, though YOU are a NEW mama every time you give birth.
There is a New You, and there is a New Baby, and their care relies solely on you.
We have villages, and families, and friends, and caregivers, sometimes.
And then they go home.
They aren’t always there through the long sleepless nights, or the days on end when you can’t put them down.
I can speak only for myself when I say having our third has been the toughest by far. It’s been the most lonely, the most exhausting, and the most emotionally taxing. It’s left me feeling so far removed from myself. There is nothing left in the tank when you’re over touched, under fed, out of sleep and with little to no time alone. How are we to fill that tank when the thought of leaving the house is even too much at times?
In my years as a postpartum doula I saw the deleterious effects of the above on women who were struggling with depression and/or anxiety and it was heartbreaking. Not every mama who is lonely during this time is depressed or anxious, though this special time in a woman’s life is definitely a rite of passage for a reason.
When we can come together as mamas with our wee ones and share, we create a powerful sense of community for which there is no explanation. We surround ourselves with women who couldn’t be any more different than we are and yet who couldn’t be any more the same.
And we cry and we hold each other up and we hold each others babies and we laugh at how, in the midst of it all, we make it. We make it. Every day.
This video below shares what has been on my heart for years, and I’m so excited to share it with you.
Join us for our New Mama: the Postpartum Year gatherings and learn more about it in the video below: